Financial Support Advice

Hi Attorney,

Just want to ask for some advice. I am married and I found out that my husband has a mistress and left our house with our 1 year old son. I allowed him to borrow our son once a week since he’s still the father provided that he will not bring my son to his mistress. But then a friend told me that they see posts in social media showing that my husband and my son is together with the mistress in a resort. My husband is not telling me the truth of my son’s whereabouts when he borrowed him. So knowing that, I told my husband that I will no longer allow him to borrow my son. And now that he no longer borrow’s my son, he also stopped his financial to us every month.

Can I still demand for his financial support to me and my son even if I no longer allow him to borrow my son? Are my reasons valid for not allowing him to borrow my son?

Hoping for your advise on this matter.

Thank you.

calebpinca wrote: Can I still demand for his financial support to me and my son even if I no longer allow him to borrow my son? Are my reasons valid for not allowing him to borrow my son?

Well. You say "my" son, but I suppouse it's your son together with your husband.
And I suppouse you haven't had any court case concerning custody for the son. And your husband hasn't found guilty to VIOLENCE against you or your son? Corect?

If so:
You can demand support. (It depend though of what you earn yourself compared to him.)
BUT I BELIEVE you have no right to make visit demands, your husband have right to his son too...
BUT he make an adultery crime by having a mistress, which you can use as THREAT to file a case if you negotiate with him. But if you do it, then it's risk he will be found guilty and get less chance to earn money to pay support.

Lunkan wrote:

calebpinca wrote: Can I still demand for his financial support to me and my son even if I no longer allow him to borrow my son? Are my reasons valid for not allowing him to borrow my son?

Well. You say "my" son, but I suppouse it's your son together with your husband.
And I suppouse you haven't had any court case concerning custody for the son. And your husband hasn't found guilty to VIOLENCE against you or your son? Corect?

If so:
You can demand support. (It depend though of what you earn yourself compared to him.)
BUT I BELIEVE you have no right to make visit demands, your husband have right to his son too...
BUT he make an adultery crime by having a mistress, which you can use as THREAT to file a case    if you negotiate with him. But if you do it, then it's risk he will be found guilty and get less chance to earn money to pay support.

Thank you for response. Well yes, he is OUR son. There's no court case yet or any demand letters or what so ever. I'm still lost of what to do now that he no longer continue to send us the financial support. I'm just afraid that since I no longer allow him to borrow our son, he now has the right to cut his financial support to us.

Will he take it against me that I no longer allow him to borrow our son? Can he file a case against me?

calebpinca wrote:Thank you for response. Well yes, he is OUR son. There's no court case yet or any demand letters or what so ever. I'm still lost of what to do now that he no longer continue to send us the financial support. I'm just afraid that since I no longer allow him to borrow our son, he now has the right to cut his financial support to us.

Will he take it against me that I no longer allow him to borrow our son? Can he file a case against me?

He DON'T "borrow" your son, the son is his too. You have EQUAL right to the son. (If going to court, then it's normal the mother get SOME more right, when the child is small, but that will probably NOT include you can demand where they go.)

(As far as I know) you BOTH do wrong.
/You aren't allowed to deny him the son.
/He has to pay support (Asuming he own more than you).
/He do adultery crime.

So it's 2-1 advantage to you

Lunkan wrote:

calebpinca wrote:Thank you for response. Well yes, he is OUR son. There's no court case yet or any demand letters or what so ever. I'm still lost of what to do now that he no longer continue to send us the financial support. I'm just afraid that since I no longer allow him to borrow our son, he now has the right to cut his financial support to us.

Will he take it against me that I no longer allow him to borrow our son? Can he file a case against me?

He DON'T "borrow" your son, the son is his too. You have EQUAL right to the son.  (If going to court, then it's normal the mother get SOME more right, when the child is small, but that will probably NOT include you can demand where they go.)

(As far as I know) you BOTH do wrong.
/You aren't allowed to deny him the son.
/He has to pay support   (Asuming he own more than you).
/He do adultery crime.

So it's 2-1 advantage to you  

Ok, let's say I will not deny him our son. I'll allow him to visit him but he can't bring him. Because what I fear is that he might not bring him back.

Am I still violating his rights when I allow him visit our son instead?

When it comes to paying support, does it mean that if I earn more than him or just the same as his earnings he no longer have to support us financially?

calebpinca wrote: Ok, let's say I will not deny him our son. I'll allow him to visit him but he can't bring him. Because what I fear is that he might not bring him back.

Am I still violating his rights when I allow him visit our son instead?

Yes, still illegal as long as a court hasn't decided that.

calebpinca wrote: When it comes to paying support, does it mean that if I earn more than him or just the same as his earnings he no longer have to support us financially?

Support are paid after capacity.
If you earn same, then you both pay half of the costs for the SON.

If he earn much more than you, then you have some chance to get support for YOURSELF too, IF you have done your best to earn yourself. If you earn more, it can become the opposite.

How old is your son?
If he is baby/toddler needing caretaking all the time, I suppouse that have effect at what's expected you will do to earn yourself.

Lunkan wrote:

calebpinca wrote: Ok, let's say I will not deny him our son. I'll allow him to visit him but he can't bring him. Because what I fear is that he might not bring him back.

Am I still violating his rights when I allow him visit our son instead?

Yes, still illegal as long as a court hasn't decided that.

calebpinca wrote:  When it comes to paying support, does it mean that if I earn more than him or just the same as his earnings he no longer have to support us financially?

Support are paid after capacity.
If you earn same, then you both pay half of the costs for the SON.

If he earn much more than you, then you have some chance to get support for YOURSELF too, IF you have done your best to earn yourself.  If you earn more, it can become the opposite.

How old is your son?  
If he is baby/toddler needing caretaking all the time, I suppouse that have effect at what's expected you will do to earn yourself.

My son just turned 1 year old. He needs caretaking while I'm at work. I there an effect if he is still a baby?

calebpinca wrote: My son just turned 1 year old. He needs caretaking while I'm at work. I there an effect if he is still a baby?

Perhaps a court would count that.

Good day po,

Nais ko lang po sana magpatulong kung ano pwede kong ikaso sa asawa ko, iniwan na niya kami ng anak namin pra lng sa babae nya. 9 months palang po ang baby namin at kakaisang taon palang kming kasal. gusto ko po sana makulong ang asawa ko pati kabit niya. lumayas po ang asawa ko sa bahay nila, at hinuli ko po ang asawa ko kung san po sya tumutuloy nun. pinuntahan ko po yung bahay nung kabit, at dun ko po nakita ang asawa ko na tinatago ng kabit nya sa kwarto niya. at nalaman ko din kaya pala natanggal sila sa trabaho kasi po nahuli sila sa cctv na may ginagawang mali. at isa pa pahirapan din po ako humingi ng sustento sknya. ano po pwede ko isampa sa asawa ko, gusto ko ibalik sknya lahat ng ginawa nya sken. pati yung pananakit niya physical sken. sana po matulungan niyo ako. Thanks. May laban po ba ako ?