I have a 1 year old child (having my last name) with my girlfriend who I have been having a relationship with for several years now. She already has two other illegitimate children before I met her. We have a very difficult relationship full of arguments and conflicts (irreconcilable differences) and physical abuse from her to me. Recently, I found out that she has been cheating on me. Have I known earlier, I would have not stayed long in the relationship and perhaps we wouldn't have a child together. Now, I know that my relationship with her is just based on lies and deception. She is a fraud trying to take all the resources she can take from me for her and her children's benefit. It appears that she has no plans of stopping and opening up to me what her wrongdoings.
Question: Is there anything I can do to use what I know about her (unstable behavior, infidelity and lies) to my advantage in seeking custody of our child?
I know the mother has full responsibility and rights over our child, but can I use my evidences to make a threat to her that I will be disclosing them all to her whole family and friends if she doesn't agree to give me full custody of our child? or something like that? Even if the family code is biased to women in regard to custody, I'm sure there is something I can do to make things fairer.
I want to get even with her but I do not want our child to get affected and suffer at the same time.
Some information to consider:
-Mother is currently unemployed (and unemployed for the longest time)
-Her two other illegitimate children are under the care of her grandparents.
-Since she got pregnant, apart from her daily living expenses that I of course shoulder, I give her P11,000 monthly to provide for her two other illegitimate children. She asked me that we make it appear that she is working abroad just to hide her pregnancy. She said her grandparents will stop the support/allowance of her frist two children if they find out about her pregnancy.
-She and some of her friends and family knows the situation(infidelity) and yet did not do anything about it.
-With my financial help, she is now scheduled to work abroad soon for real.
-We have been living in together since she became pregnant
-We have verbal settlement that she will leave our child to me under my custody and guardianship for 3-4 years or until such time she becomes financially capable to support our child (and her two other children). This, we will put into writing soon.
-She doesn't know that I know her lies already.
Please help.
Last edited by jm_dm on Tue Dec 09, 2014 8:06 pm; edited 5 times in total