Not married, with kids. The mother of the kids has another guy.

My friend (J) has two kids (11 & 14) with a woman (M). They are not married, but they have stayed together for 15 years.

Since December of 2011, M has seen another guy. The kids are hurt and traumatized. J wants to take the kids away. Should J (in the presence of a public official, police and another witness) just have her kids tell their M that they don't want to be with her anymore, and want to go with J? Can they leave without any legal repercussions against J?

I'm scared for my friend since M could easily hurt herself or be hurt by someone, and tell everybody that she was physically attacked by J. The problem is, M could conveniently say that J has a motive to hurt her because of what she is doing.

The in-laws are getting involved, as well. Can J do something for the in-laws to stop intruding their affairs.

Thank you.

Are the kids recognized/acknowledged by the father?

Is it shown in the birth certificates?

cjlm01 wrote:My friend (J) has two kids (11 & 14) with a woman (M). They are not married, but they have stayed together for 15 years.

Since December of 2011, M has seen another guy. The kids are hurt and traumatized. J wants to take the kids away. Should J (in the presence of a public official, police and another witness) just have her kids tell their M that they don't want to be with her anymore, and want to go with J? Can they leave without any legal repercussions against J?

I'm scared for my friend since M could easily hurt herself or be hurt by someone, and tell everybody that she was physically attacked by J. The problem is, M could conveniently say that J has a motive to hurt her because of what she is doing.

The in-laws are getting involved, as well. Can J do something for the in-laws to stop intruding their affairs.

Thank you.

illegitimate children shall be under the parental authority of their mother.

ibonidarna - Yes, J is recognized by everyone that they know. His name is also in both birth certificates.

concepab - even if the 2 kids are already 11 and 14 years old, they would still go to the mom? Can't they choose already?

if they are not married, then only the mother has the right to custody and parental authority. if j wants custody, he should be prepared for an uphill legal battle and it is his burden to prove that the children are in a dangerous situation so that he can be awarded custody